Kikoni's Writing Tips (oh, boy..)

[Kikoni]

A friend of mine recently asked me to give him what would functionally be a list of tips for creative writing, or more specifically writing stories/fanfics.

While The Legionnaire is my first fanfic, it is not my first story. I often sit down with my laptop and just type out entire story arcs and/or create different universes and alternate realities. This is, indeed, more my style, but fanfiction has always been something I've read into (the good stuff, at least) and is something I've wanted to try my hand at.

Thus, with my experience being stated, let's continue with Kikoni's Writing Tips.

First off, we'll list a few things that are pet-peeves amongst viewers. These are things you should *not* do, under any circumstances, as it will annoy the reader and thus it may persuade him/her not to read.


1. Text Blocking.

I'll give you an example:

~"How much fuel do you need to top her off, Rob?" asked Jimmy, a glint of humor in his wizened eyes. "Five gallons, Jim ol' boy." Came the reply from Rob, who cringed at the fact that he just answered Jimmy's question in the same paragraph.~

Here's the proper way to do this:

~"How much fuel do you need to top her off, Rob?" Asked Jimmy, a glint of humor in his wizened eyes.

"Five gallons, Jim ol' boy." Came the reply from Rob, now much happier to be in his own paragraph.~

This is a common mistake many new and even experienced writers make, but one that is detrimental to the skim-reading habits of many a reader.

2. Huge Paragraphs.

This is another all-too-common problem in many fics. Often a writer does not hit the enter key enough and ends up with one massive paragraph.

I'll give you an example by taking three paragraphs from the prologue of The Legionnaire and cramming them together:

~My mother and father were miners, putting bread on the table by way of a mining laser and tractorbeam. For the most part, they made enough to keep us going rather strong -- that is, until my mother had taken ill with some unknown disease. My father worked both his and her shift from then on, spending even more money on medicine in hopes of curing her. We'd barely had enough to eat for a solid six months. Eventually, though, my mother passed; the disease having eaten her brain away. I still remember looking into her eyes the night before she died and telling her I loved her. I cried in my father's arms all night when she didn't remember who I was. My dad kept up with the double shifts to support us and, due to lacking someone to raise me in my mother's stead, we both pretty much lived and breathed mining. I was seven and I already knew how to fly the ship well enough to navigate home. My dad cruised forward on inertial thrusters towards the asteroid we were tasked with mining. This was to save fuel, as it was expensive and using the poorly optimized Inertial Dampening System (IDS) was a very easy way to go bankrupt. Flying on inertial was more fun, anyways. It allowed one to strafe and make maneuvers that wouldn't otherwise work. It took little more brain-space than IDS, making me wonder why they designed it in the first place. One day, I'd asked my father about it, eliciting a chuckle from him.~

Here's the correct way to do this:

~My mother and father were miners, putting bread on the table by way of a mining laser and tractorbeam. For the most part, they made enough to keep us going rather strong -- that is, until my mother had taken ill with some unknown disease. My father worked both his and her shift from then on, spending even more money on medicine in hopes of curing her. We barely had enough to eat for a solid six months.

Eventually, though, my mother passed; the disease having eaten her brain away. I still remember looking into her eyes the night before she died and telling her I loved her. I cried in my father's arms all night when she didn't remember who I was. My dad kept up with the double shifts to support us and, due to lacking someone to raise me in my mother's stead, we both pretty much lived and breathed mining. I was seven and I already new khow to fly the ship well enough to navigate home.

My dad cruised forward on inertial thrusters towards the asteroid we were tasked with mining. This was to save fuel, as it was expensive and using the poorly optimized Inertial Dampening System (IDS) was a very easy way to go bankrupt. Flying on inertial was more fun, anyways. It allowed one to strafe and make maneuvers that wouldn't otherwise work. It took little more brain-space than IDS, making me wonder why they designed it in the first place. One day, I'd asked my father about it, eliciting a chuckle from him.~

This is much easier to read and looks better, too!

So, in closing, don't be afraid to hit that enter key!

3. One Line Paragraphs.

In contrast to the last statement, one can, indeed, hit the enter key too much. From this bad habit springs forth the dreaded one line paragraphs.

I will once more make use of a paragraph from the prologue of "The Legionaire"

This is how *not* to do it:

~We moved in mining range of the asteroid and my dad hit the toggle for the laser.

He spun his chair around, navigating with merely his elbow.

Antics like that used to scare me, but after a while I had learned to trust the man's skill behind the stick.

As our little Talon class ship cruised in a circle around the asteroid, mining as it went, my father grinned down at me buckled in on the bench on the wall adjacent to his captain's chair.

It was moments like these when he would tell me how much I looked like my mother. I had her dark brown, curly hair and her green eyes.~

Now let's see it done properly:

~We moved in mining range of the asteroid and my dad hit the toggle for the laser. He spun his chair around, navigating with merely his elbow. Antics like that used to scare me, but after a while I had learned to trust the man's skill behind the stick. As our little Talon class ship cruised in a circle around the asteroid, mining as it went, my father grinned down at me buckled in on the bench on the wall adjacent to his captain's chair. It was moments like these when he would tell me how much I looked like my mother. I had her dark brown, curly hair and her green eyes.~

See the difference? Little things like these can add up to make a seriously big problem. So, while you shouldn't be afraid to hit that enter key, practice some self-control in doing so, also.

4. Persona Invasion.

This one is a bit tougher to explain. Sometimes a writer wants to put a piece of him/herself in the story they are plugging away at. This is not a bad idea in the slightest if you do it right.

One way to do this wrong is to put too much of yourself into the main character of the story you are writing. Doing this causes you to become self-aware and thus change elements of the story (sometimes in completely unexplainable ways) to suit your character. This is not a good way to go about it and leads to you randomly giving your character 1 billion credits or somehow having him promoted to Fleet Admiral of the Alliance Navy. Not to mention the fact that he will most likely be invincible and crush any foes in his path.

This is the risk every writer takes with Persona Invasion, and I do not recommend even pondering the introduction of a piece of your personality into your main character's persona until you have more experience in writing.

5. A Pointless Character.

Too often new writers introduce a seemingly bland character in order to have that same character do something that promotes a plot-twist or something along those lines, only to have that character disappear or be killed off soon after.

This is very lazy work and should not be done.

Each character you throw into a story should have some merit in and of themselves. They should have a personality, a backstory (whether you use it or not), and some form of purpose. There is only one way to do this correctly, and it should only be done, in my opinion, once per story.

For the sake of the story, you may, indeed, have a one-hit wonder type character. This character should come in at an emotional moment or when drama is needed and do something to promote the next plot-twist or story arc. This character should have something about him that is memorable and should disappear or be killed off in a memorable way.

This way it strikes emotion in the reader at what this character does or what happens to this character, rather than them merely not caring about this bland man you randomly introduced. It also makes the twist or arc that much more powerful and interesting.

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Post will be continued when I have the time to sit down and write more. Tell me what you think of it so far, pilots.

[Edited on 11-23-2012 by Kikoni]

[EN4CER]

This is good stuff! Please post this in my story forum along with your legionnaire and I'll sticky it. Being an amateur I'm always looking for reads like this.


[Edited on 11-23-2012 by EN4CER]

[Kikoni]

This is good stuff! Please post this in my story forum along with your legionnaire and I'll sticky it. Being an amateur I'm always looking for reads like this.


[Edited on 11-23-2012 by EN4CER]

Got it done, my friend.