Presenting a Zen Moment

[BraveHart]

Water Jumps

That's Cool Storm.....I have done quite a few water jumps in my time and the 1st time I jumped into the water was a real Hoot...The parachute club I belong to had set up a water jump for those of us who needed it for license qualification. The jump took place over the Puget sound ocean near the Beach...those that needed a water jump landed in the drink while everyone else could land on the Beach....It was a really warm day and we jumped out at 7500ft did some RW and broke off and opened under canopy....I used my old 28ft parachute for the jump and looked forward to landing in the water, but there was one small problem....there were so many boats and ski-sleds in the water that they were a hazard...there was only suppose to be 1 pick up boat, but everyone on the ocean that saw the 1st load jump came over to observe....I thought this was going to be a rough one as I saw the 1st jumper land in the water and was immediately set upon by well meaning people but swimming away from the parachute would be hazardous...as luck would have it there was a big Yacht there and I headed for it to try and land on the other side where there were no other watercraft.... the people in the water saw me head that way and they all took of in numbers to be there waiting for me as I landed.....but the Joke was on them! as I was going over the Yacht I quickly pulled down on my right toggle to turn and go back the other way!! My Favorite part of the Jump was watching the Guy who owned the Boat watching what everyone was doing in the water....when all of a sudden a shadow passed over him and he looked up and saw me passing over him by about 6 ft above his Head.....I waved at him and said "Good Afternoon Mate" as I shot past him and into the water.....Ha-Ha-Ha. The look on his Face and the dropping of the martini was priceless

[Storm]

My ONE water jump wasn't as exciting. It was near a good beach, a tourist area, but the Philippines has never been known for "high trade volume". No boats to do flybys on when I did my water jump.

Oh - here is a silly little story I remembered today - didn't happen to me, or to anyone I know, but I heard the anecdote years ago, I forget who.

These jumpers on vacation were new to a particular DZ, way out in the country with an isolated airfield. They aquainted themselves, made arrangements, and started jumping. They were self sufficient and doing their own spotting. So they would drop a streamer at 2500 or so, and when it landed they would select their landmarks, ascend, and then do high freefalls.

For some reason, they kept landing WAY out in the boonies. They couldn't figure out why, they were all good, experienced jumpers, but they were making laughingstocks of themselves to the local jumpers. "No, we don't really have tricky shifty winds here", they were told.

Towards the afternoon, when they were about to change their names and trade in for new identities, it dawned on them.

The rocks and boulders that they were selecting as their landmarks were....

... cows and horses.

[BraveHart]

"Bull? What Bull?

He-He.....cows and horses now that jogged a memory of mine :

One fine Saturday morning at 8:00 am my friends and I were boarding the cessna182 for a RW Jump from 7500ft....I did not spot this load as I was in the back of the plane.....soon the pilot called for jump run and the jumpmaster opened the door and spotted the load....soon we heard the call to cut the engine and we all moved forward and out the door....the skydive was hot as we completed our 4 way maneuvers....but after my canopy opened I saw we were way off the correct spot....Ugh, now I had to pick a place safe to land and there were trees everywhere, finally I spotted a small square clearing and headed for it...I was jumping my PC at the time and easily made a stand up landing. As I was rolling up my chute in my arms I heard this loud "SNORT" which scared the bijjebers out of me!! as I turned I saw the Biggest Black Bull that I have ever seen....This Critter was Snorting like crazy and plowing and pounding the ground....whoo boy! I knew that critter could run faster then I could....so I stood absolutely still and ponder what to do when the answer presented itself to me....Another jumper had also chosen the same patch of green to land in...only he had a red square canopy and was moving pretty quick when he came in...ha-ha the Bull had this confused look on it's face as he looked at me then at the other fast moving target....since I was standing still he decided to take off after the other Jumper as soon as the Bull ran past me I hauled butt in the opposite direction as fast as my feet could carry me....I made it to the fence and Hopped over and Fell on the Ground laughing as the Bull chased my buddy to the other side of the Fence he was able to use his quick release to jettison his red canopy thus allowing him to run faster....the bull helped him up and over the fence and then proceeded to vent out his frustration on the left behind parachute....Ha Ha Ha what a Hoot that was !! I survived to Skydive another Day

[Storm]

Hehehe .... Red Canopy!
(ChuckleSnort).

[PingBosun]

Sod that for a game of soldiers!!!

[Scouseair]

Erm, that is a US Army Blackhawk. Royal Navy uses Sea Kings, Lynxs and Merlins. Also appears to be the Golden Gate bridge in the background. Smells like photoshop.


edit: In fact, a quick search revealed this story

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news ... eyear.html

[Edited on 24-1-2009 by Scouseair]

[MMaggio]

DOH! It was emailed to me along with some others! But what about the "paratroop" photo above. That should be real.

[Storm]

There IS something kind of fishy about it.

From the angle, it looks like a C10 canopy (or some variation) (not a high performance rig). Normally, unless the wind is very high or something the 'chute / paratrooper wouldn't be able to "swing out sideways" at that angle.

Look at the water for an indication of how windy it wasn't.

It is hard to tell from the photograph, but otherwise one COULD examine it to see if the 'trooper was "honking down on his steering toggles" to cause such a wide swing, almost putting the canopy into a stall. Except that C10s, T10s etc normally don't stall so deeply (or turn like that), as a high performance 'chute would. It looks like just the image of the chutist was taken from the ground, and possibly pasted in.

There IS a reflection of the chutist in the water (probably manipulative "magic" to add credibility). But look at the sun, and the angles of the shadows in all other objects in the scene, and the amount of foreground there is to examine. The 'chutest has no shadow.

Obviously, though, the point of both photographs (real or not) is to portray a humorous situation.

(ehdited fer spehling errorz)


[Edited on 1-25-2009 by Storm]

[BraveHart]

Ha Ha Ha What a Hoot ......I could just see that happening "Yoda" is rolling on the ground in fits of Laughter

[Edited on 1-25-2009 by BraveHart]

[MMaggio]

Yeah well, all that may be, but the gators all seem to be staring at the hapless 'trooper' with some anticipation!
Wether fake or not, I'd hoped it would bring amusement, not an opportunity to be disected.
Glad you enjoyed it Brave!:D

[BraveHart]

I certainly did MM....he-he, Please post more as you find them

[Scouseair]

Yep, they were good ones. No offence meant.

And probably more fun than the real photos of the year.

[BraveHart]

"Huey Jump"

I love Jumping from Helicopters!!! and serving in the US Army provided me a lot of opportunities to do just that as I joined the parachute club at each of my Duty stations....I was even able to jump out of the Marines version of a Chinook ( Hope I spelled that right ). I have quite a few stories about jumping out of Helicopters.

One of my Favorite one involves a discussion over a few brews the night before the scheduled jump on Saturday as to whether or not a Jumper could crawl out and step on the skid of a Huey UH1H before Jumping....He-He, Yeah you know what went through my mind . So the next day on one of our Jumps I had another one of my buddies do the spotting, while the Huey was on Jump Run I slipped out the door and placed my feet on the skid and stood on it...What a Hoot. But, Yeah you know me, there's always a but. I went even further with it as I climbed my way to the front of the Huey and Plastered myself onto the windshield of the Huey and scared the crap out of the pilots...he-he-he. Once they saw it was me they both started busting a Gut ...of Course the case of Beer I gave them that night after jumping smoothed things over as they had to change their underwear. The Skydive was a successful one by the way

[Daedalao]

Gah, no strap packs in a huey... You're pretty fortunate the blades were being friendly that day!

[Storm]

I've only had ONE jump from a helicopter (it was a Huey). It was very fun, and unique compared to a 'plane.
(for the benefit of everyone reading, plane "modified" for jumping IE no door, only one seat for the pilot, more "floor space" for everyone to cram themselves in like sardines and sit on the floor. You HAVE to keep your hand over your reserve 'chute ripcord handle, otherwise it might snag on someone and deploy inside the plane.... not good. I've seen pictures.....).
Not much to say about that one jump - pretty standard, except that it was my only helicopter jump - NICE for the visibility, and relative "roominess".

Based on where I was stationed, there weren't that many opportunities. My FIRST jump ever was in Orange, Massachusetts. I was a student at Fort Devens at the time... fresh out of Basic Training, and "learning my trade". So on some weekends some of us who got into it could make it to Orange to jump. Didn't have that many though during the year (13 months) that I was there.

Then came Clark AFB... MOST of my jumps, and development as a jumper were there. Just a very good jump club, really enjoyed it. But all we had were small planes.

Then came Fort Carson Colorado, and Ellicott Colorado (which I just remembered, "Jump Story"! Later - next post.) The *Fort Carson* jump club was on again, off again. Not very well organized, kept closing down. Never had a jump with them, everytime "one was scheduled", no one showed up. Mostly, you had to travel about 80 miles east to Ellicott. A pretty fun club - tricky microclimate (shifty winds because of teh mountains to the west, and Ellicott is on a FLAT plain).

MUCH later, back to Fort Devens as an instructor. Orange, Massachusetts. And the 10th Special Forces Group had an on again, off again jump club, but a little better organized. Mostly, the club just carpooled to Orange. BUT, thats where I had my one jump from a chopper. It was very enjoyable everyone involved did an excellent job of organizing. It was rare (strangely) that they could get a chopper commited for them. "Use of Government Equipment" kind of thing.

BraveHart - eventually you're gonna tell us 'bout balloons I hope? (your first post in this thread).

THAT sounds interesting!

[Storm]

There is (or at least was at one time) a jump center near Ellicott, Colorado. Tricky place, it is on a flat plain about 80+ miles east of the Rocky Mountains. The winds do "weird stuff".

Also tends to be stormy sometimes. Unpredictably. Sometimes, they would get a real "frog strangler".

When the winds kicked up (everyone's eye on the wind sock and wind gauges at all times), you had to knock off and wait. And wait. And wait.

There is a funny little game called "hackensack", or simply "hacky".... using a tiny ball (usually leather) - about the size of a pingpong ball... jumpers waiting for the weather to cooperate gather in a circle, and you kind of knock the ball around with just your heels or the side of you foot. Looks like an Irish jig, sort of. Tradition has it that jumpers in Hackensack, New Jersey invented the game while waiting for the wind to die down. I've heard of / read claims that "hacky" was invented elsewhere, and not by jumpers. (shrug) (dunno). ANYway, at Ellicott you play a lot of hacky.

One time the sky was a LITTLE angry (between "overcast" and "I'm gonna rain down on you!"). Winds were up. Jumpers were eyeballing the windsock (attached to a wooden pole, on the side of the hanger), playing hacky, talking, joking, sitting around.

I was leaning against a plane - one hand on the wing.

*BOOM*. (sort of). A sound so loud that you FELT it, more than heard it.

I was dazed. On the ground. When my senses cleared, almost everyone was on the ground.

The windsock was gone. I mean the wooden pole and everything. Maybe later, they might have found the remains of the wire loop from the base of the sock (I dunno).

Funny black streaky burn marks on the sides of the hanger - on ALL sides.

No one was hurt, fotunately ... just stunned a little. (I felt like I had been "body slammed" for a couple of minutes... no PAIN, just couldn't think straight).

It was a couple of weeks before anyone jumped there again.

[Ravenfeeder]

Never did much "skydiving" (HALOs) we called them, high altitude low opening. Was on the course at RAF Netherhaven, had done three solo jumps, from varing hights this was back in the early 70's. Got called off the course, to go on an op.

The op was a jump in the Panhandle area of the Hindu Kush, at night. Just two of us, the other guy was from one of the civvy spook mobs, and we were jumping from an estimated 35,000ft, and the QFE was an estimate also. Opening altitude was left to our discretion!

We had no GPS in those days, it was, a compass bearing, and the MK1 eyeball, which wasn't all that much good in a dark, moonless, night. And, our DZ was a flashing yellow light, at approximately 7,500ft. We were issued with what, they called a "flying wing" which none of the two of us had yet used.

It was a bit on the hairy side, and despite all of our protective gear, it was bloody freezing - I've never known cold like it.

More by luck than judgement, we made the DZ, and I do really mean luck.

I never got sent back to Netherhaven to finish the course.

[BraveHart]

I can relate to that Ravenfeeder......that high of an altitude doing a military "HALO" can be quite the freezing experience. A GPS device back in that time period would definitely have helped a lot of ops go easier....Ha-Ha a compass and a calibrated eyeball were the norm back then

[shewter]

LOL, I like to keep TWO FEET on the ground as they say.
Heck I'm 47 yrs old and the first airplane i ever got on was in june of 08 lol

[Edited on 1-26-2009 by shewter]

[Edited on 1-26-2009 by shewter]

[Storm]

Originally posted by shewter
LOL, I like to keep TWO FEET on the ground as they say.
Heck I'm 47 yrs old and the first airplane i ever got on was in june of 08 lol

Out of thousands of feet (or meters) of freefall...
...it's only the last half inch (or centimeter) that hurts the most.